Have you ever got irritated with Chinese restaraunt fortune cookies, or am I the only cynical person who finds their unceasing optimism annoying?
If you have, then you might find Bad Cookie a refreshing breeze of psuedo-Confucius realism in a far too cheerful world...
Choice examples include "you are not one of the people who "goes places" in life", and "you will fail in all you attempt", and clicking on the cookie becomes oddly compelling, as you find yourself searching for the most hopeless fate possible.
At last, Oriental, post-take-away mysticism for the pessimists....
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Thursday, 10 January 2008
Wednesday, 24 January 2007
Tuesday, 23 January 2007
The Simpsons!
This is a clip from one of my favourite simpson episodes; Homer's Phobia. Its when Homer takes Bart to a steel mill in an attempt to make him 'straight' but is confronted with a mill full of flamboyantly gay workers...oh homer, he makes me chuckle.
Thursday, 18 January 2007
Top Eleven Lesbian Fashion Accessories
I found this article quite funny
http://www.afterellen.com/node/4520
I've no idea why there are eleven items on this list rather than the usual ten, but hey, it works(probably something to do with there being eleven items on it.)Hmm, "Top Eleven Lesbian Fashion Accessories", I can see that in next month's Vogue! It was quite funny reading it and ticking off the ones I'm guilty of...
Flannel: check (although I only wear my flannel shirt when I'm ill, or channelling the spirit of Kurt Cobain).
Guitars...I've lusted over them, but never bought one.
Motorcycle jacket:check. Black leather, cummon!
Vest, hmm, thats a waistcoat to us proper English speakers, what we call a vest is number two on the list, a ribbed tanktop.And yes I own both of these, but Kate Moss does have a similar one to me, and my ribbed tanktop is saved by being pink.Not so butch now, huh?
Tattoos, hmm, does a henna addiction count?
Oh, and ties. I do like my ties, but they've gotta be skinny! I have the basic black, and one that I just could not resist, black with hot pink slashes and the legend "girls rock!" How queercore is that?!
http://www.afterellen.com/node/4520
I've no idea why there are eleven items on this list rather than the usual ten, but hey, it works(probably something to do with there being eleven items on it.)Hmm, "Top Eleven Lesbian Fashion Accessories", I can see that in next month's Vogue! It was quite funny reading it and ticking off the ones I'm guilty of...
Flannel: check (although I only wear my flannel shirt when I'm ill, or channelling the spirit of Kurt Cobain).
Guitars...I've lusted over them, but never bought one.
Motorcycle jacket:check. Black leather, cummon!
Vest, hmm, thats a waistcoat to us proper English speakers, what we call a vest is number two on the list, a ribbed tanktop.And yes I own both of these, but Kate Moss does have a similar one to me, and my ribbed tanktop is saved by being pink.Not so butch now, huh?
Tattoos, hmm, does a henna addiction count?
Oh, and ties. I do like my ties, but they've gotta be skinny! I have the basic black, and one that I just could not resist, black with hot pink slashes and the legend "girls rock!" How queercore is that?!
Sunday, 14 January 2007
Wannaspell-groovy site of the day!
http://wannaspell.com is a really cool little site, and the premise is really simple.You move letters around the screen in order to spell words.The catch is, so are other users! It can be very frustrating when people steal your letters, but the site is really addictive!
Friday, 12 January 2007
Thursday, 11 January 2007
The Dark And Bright Rainbow!
This is a really cool little site.By clicking on the banner, you will visit the Dark And Bright internet rainbow, and you will automatically add a stripe to it in your own personal colour!
Pointless, but pretty!
Wednesday, 10 January 2007
Friday, 22 December 2006
Gonorrhea!
I've just been watching the new NHS adverts about sexually transmitted diseases, encouraging people to wear condoms, and I've decided that the brushed steel gonorrhea belt buckle is fucking cool.
Adverts.
I've just seen the advert for the new Durex Play vibrating ring.Apparently its the first time a sex toy has been advertused on tv.
Tuesday, 19 December 2006
A little ego-boost for you...
Fed up of low self-esteem? Always putting yourself down? Then this is for you! http://www.jobsite.co.uk/youaremighty/index2.html
Believe it or not,that is actually part of a job-finding website and is designed to up your self-esteem, not to make you wet your pants giggling at the cheesiness of it!
And I should really credit this one to RJ, as she sent me the link.
Believe it or not,that is actually part of a job-finding website and is designed to up your self-esteem, not to make you wet your pants giggling at the cheesiness of it!
And I should really credit this one to RJ, as she sent me the link.
Monday, 18 December 2006
Jezebelle ponders the mysteries of the universe...Part Deux
Revels.
Now, I am not a particularly big fan of these sweets, but I received some as a christmas present, and eating them in the bath, I formed Jezebelle's Theory of Revels, which is thus:
Perfectly round, large ones, tend to be malteser
Round, flat ones, seem to usually be toffee
Small, irregularly shaped ones are raisins because of course raisins are all dofferent shapes and sizes, but never round
Now, the only ones I don't have clue about are coffee and orange, yet these are the ones that I most need to identify because I hate them! Any ideas?
Now, I am not a particularly big fan of these sweets, but I received some as a christmas present, and eating them in the bath, I formed Jezebelle's Theory of Revels, which is thus:
Perfectly round, large ones, tend to be malteser
Round, flat ones, seem to usually be toffee
Small, irregularly shaped ones are raisins because of course raisins are all dofferent shapes and sizes, but never round
Now, the only ones I don't have clue about are coffee and orange, yet these are the ones that I most need to identify because I hate them! Any ideas?
Friday, 8 December 2006
Silly String Saves Lives?
Apparently, US soldiers in Iraq have been sent a shipment of the popular kids toy Silly String...They use it when they are about to enter buildings to detect booby traps, by spraying it across the room.If it falls to the floor, then the room is safe, but if it hangs in mid-air, its caught on a trip-wire. How bizarre...
Thursday, 7 December 2006
Harry Potter And The Under-Age Blowjob
This summary is not available. Please
click here to view the post.
George Bush Speech-writer
Have you ever listened to a George Bush speech, laughed at his inane comments, and thought to yourself "I could do better than that!"? Well, now is your chance, with The George Bush Speech Writer!
http://www.actofme.co.uk/bush_speech/bushspeechwriter.html
At first it might seem like there aren't many options availabe, but if you click on the blue tabs to the right of the word bank, there are a lot more quotes for you to use. There's also a nifty applause option to mimic the voice of the mindless masses that agree with him.
And just so you know what you're up against, here are some oratorial gems from the man himself:
"The trouble with the French is that they don't have a word for entrepreneur"
Riiiiiiight, George.
"We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease."
Not a continent.Hell no, Africa has never been a continent, has it, George?
"We both use Colgate toothpaste."
He said that after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001
"It is white."
And he said that after being asked by a child in Britain what the White House was like, July 19, 2001
Remind me why he's in charge of the most powerful nation on earth, again?
http://www.actofme.co.uk/bush_speech/bushspeechwriter.html
At first it might seem like there aren't many options availabe, but if you click on the blue tabs to the right of the word bank, there are a lot more quotes for you to use. There's also a nifty applause option to mimic the voice of the mindless masses that agree with him.
And just so you know what you're up against, here are some oratorial gems from the man himself:
"The trouble with the French is that they don't have a word for entrepreneur"
Riiiiiiight, George.
"We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease."
Not a continent.Hell no, Africa has never been a continent, has it, George?
"We both use Colgate toothpaste."
He said that after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001
"It is white."
And he said that after being asked by a child in Britain what the White House was like, July 19, 2001
Remind me why he's in charge of the most powerful nation on earth, again?
Thursday, 14 September 2006
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